| I really just had to! |
[Jul. 27th, 2007|11:02 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  amused | ] |
for those of you who haven't seen this yet....
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| dead Baby Joke of the Day |
[Feb. 18th, 2007|01:47 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | The Studio | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  accomplished | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Bad Religion, Atheist Peace | ] |
What do you get when you cut a baby with a straight razor?
An erection. |
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| Dead Baby Joke of the Day |
[Feb. 17th, 2007|12:57 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | HELL (work) | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  crazy | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Greg Graffin, Cold As the Clay | ] |
How do you make a baby cry twice?
Wipe your bloody cock on his teddy bear. |
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| Dead Baby Joke of the Day |
[Feb. 16th, 2007|12:55 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | HELL (work) | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | busy | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | RHCP, Sir Psyco Sexy | ] |
How do you stop a baby crawling round in circles ?
Nail its other hand to the floor. |
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| Dead Baby Joke of the Day |
[Feb. 15th, 2007|12:53 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | HELL (work) | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | artistic | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | RHCP, My Lovely Man | ] |
What do you call a dead baby with no arms and no legs in the middle of the ocean?
Fucked. |
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| Dead Baby Joke of the Day |
[Feb. 14th, 2007|11:16 am] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | HELL (work) | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | accomplished | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Greg Graffin, Don't Be Afraid To Run | ] |
How do you get 100 babies into a bucket?
With a blender!
How do you get them out again?
With tortilla chips!!! |
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| Dead Baby Joke of the Day |
[Feb. 13th, 2007|01:41 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | The Studio | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | artistic | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | the hiss of my airfilter | ] |
What's the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of dead babies?
You can't unload a truck full of bowling balls with a pitchfork. |
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| Dead Baby Joke of the Day |
[Feb. 12th, 2007|02:57 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | HELL (work) | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | chipper | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | RHCP, Strip Mind | ] |
What's grosser than gross?
A garbage can full of dead babies.
What's grosser than that?
The one at the bottom is still alive.
What's grosser than that?
He has to eat his way to freedom.
What's grosser than that?
He goes back for more. |
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| Not Really What I Expected, but..... |
[Feb. 12th, 2007|02:46 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | HELL (work) | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | amused | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | RHCP, Hump de Bump | ] |
Its funny none the less.
Your results:
You are Lando Calrissian
| Lando Calrissian |
| 86% |
| Qui-Gon Jinn |
| 75% |
| Han Solo |
| 72% |
| Chewbacca |
| 70% |
| Mace Windu |
| 70% |
| Boba Fett |
| 63% |
| R2-D2 |
| 63% |
| Obi-Wan Kenobi |
| 60% |
| Emperor Palpatine |
| 59% |
| Darth Maul |
| 59% |
|
Tall, dark, and handsome.
Not much seems to bother you.
Maybe because you're so smooth.
You truly belong with us here in the clouds.
 |
(This list displays the top 10 results out of a possible 21 characters)
Click here to take the Star Wars Personality Test
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| Dead Baby Joke of the Day |
[Feb. 11th, 2007|09:52 am] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | Studio | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | chipper | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | The birds outside my window | ] |
What sits in the kitchen and keeps getting smaller and smaller?
A baby combing it's hair with a potato peeler! |
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| Dead Baby Joke of the Day |
[Feb. 9th, 2007|03:59 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | Studio | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  blah | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Crazy | ] |
What's blue and thrashes about on the floor?
A baby playing in a plastic bag. |
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| Well, it could be worse. |
[Dec. 17th, 2006|12:22 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | WORK | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | ecstatic | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | G&R "Don't Cry" | ] |
So its a Sunday and I'm currently at work. SUCKY! But wait....
After having to use my cellphone as a modem for my work computer for months (the head of our "I.T." department is a douche) I finally have a wireless DSL setup.
YYYAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYY!
This is great because i can now slack off on my computer EVEN more than I already do. HA! |
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| Meh..... |
[Dec. 11th, 2006|12:42 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  shocked | ] |
This was a vaguely interesting weekend. Worked most of Saturday as usual. I had heard that Misscerridwen had gotten a car from the WIFE. After getting back to Jersey, they picked me up at the PATH and we went grocery shopping. MY GOD. I don't think I've EVER been in a grocery store that big. Seriously, that place HAD to be like a football field and a half. We were totally overwhelmed. The WIFE had gone shopping earlier that day at our local store, but we still ended up with something like $150.00 in food ($275.00 in NYC prices). HA!!!!
There was all so a liquor store in the shopping area, and we decided to hit that up as well. another $150.00 later, we had a bottle of Johnny Walker Black, Baley's, Rum, 2 sixers of cider and a case of Sam Adams. The beer was only $23.00 for a case of 24. FUCKING HELL that place was cheap.
After the food and booze shopping, we got a Christmas tree. YAY. Its really nice to have a place big enough to fit a 7 foot xmas tree. The WIFE had to go away on business so we didn't get to decorate yet, but when she get back we will.
Up next......
The Amazing Mr. CHEEKS |
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| Good Help is SO Hard to Find |
[Dec. 7th, 2006|04:08 pm] |
Why the hell is it that most people are so fucking lazy? Most of the time I feel like I have to take it upon myself to do things because if I leave it to someone else it won't get done properly.
Example:
My little underling here at work is a fairly decent guy. Usually on top of what ever I ask him to do. However, when it is done, it is poorly. So now I have to bust some ass. SO SHITTY. |
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| Good Help is SO Hard to Find |
[Dec. 7th, 2006|04:07 pm] |
Why the hell is it that most people are so fucking lazy? Most of the time I feel like I have to take it upon myself to do things because if I leave it to someone else it won't get done properly.
Example:
My little underling here at work is a fairly decent guy. Usually on top of what ever I ask him to do. However, when it is done it is poorly. So now I have to bust some ass. SO SHITTY. |
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| Another Day, Another... |
[Dec. 6th, 2006|01:35 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | Work | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | excited | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Bad Religion/I Love My Computer | ] |
PAIN in my ASS!!!!!!!!!
So last night was my company Christmas party. Good times were had by all. Unfortunately for me, my little shop monkey had TOO good a time. Besides the fact that he was incrediblly intoxicated and almost got his ass kicked at the party by a co-worker's boyfriend, he decided to call out today. Usually this wouldn't bother me, however there are two problems with it TODAY.
1: Wednesday is the day we fill the supply needs lists for the other stores in the company
2: I HAD a doctor's appointment today at 3:45, but since he isn't here, there isn't anyone to cover.
And to top it all off I was really looking forward to getting out of work a little early. Because I had also had a good amount to drink at the party and would really like to relax.
On a happier note, cable has finally been installed in the new apartment. Which is AWESOME!!!!!!
There really isn't anything better than watching you favorite show on a 42" plasma screen television. The wife is going to Chicago for tonight which means I will be sitting in my bathrobe either playing video games or watching T.V., I haven't decided which yet. |
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| What Happened Last Night? |
[Dec. 2nd, 2006|04:09 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | 5th Level OF HELL | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | HUNGOVER | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Faith No More | ] |
Last night, my band had a show at the Delancey Lounge. Great show! Although about 3 songs in I broke my B string, which is one of the most important strings for me since I'm the lead guitarist. But I managed to pull off the rest of the set without even thinking about it. I have to say that I was impressed with myself. I wasn't aware that I was able to play that well. It made me feel really good. The other great thing about the show was the fact that the sound guy was someone that I used to work with at Manny's Music. His name is Mario if I'm not mistaken. He was excited to see me and he made sure that we sounded GREAT.
During the set I managed to slam back 3 Jack & Cokes. Plus some beer before and after. I also ended up doing a shot of Tequila with Mario. All of the alcohol abuse lead to an interesting trip back to New Jersey.
I figured that I'd be good and save some cash so, I opted to take the subway to the PATH. Yeah, DRUNK+SUBWAYS=HELL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I didn't realize that I had consumed enough to get me to the point of fuckeduppedness that I had reached. Needless to say, between the subway and liquor I probably earled 4 times in the PATH station. Trying to not be "that guy" I tried to clean it up with a near by newspaper. Once on the PATH itself, I found that I was not alone in my night of excess. The person seated in front of where I was standing decided that he wasn't going to make it home without making everyone in the train share in his misery. He proceeded to blow chunks all over the floor in front of me. The issue with that, besides him almost getting it ALL OVER my shoes, was that it caused me to almost heave on the back of his head. I managed to regain control of my gag reflex and made it to a cab on the other side. Got home and passed out.
FUCKING HELL!!!!!!
Woke up this morning with one gnarly hungover and about 15 minutes to get to work.
OOPS!
got to work an hour late because I didn't think about the fact that the PATH runs slower on the weekends. So right now I'm at work, hung over and having to deal with the piece of shit the company calls a computer so I can post things on eBay.
JOY! |
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| Waking Up is Hard to Do |
[Dec. 1st, 2006|02:43 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | HELL (work) | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  sleepy | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Alice In Chains | ] |
So, now that the WIFE and I live in Jersey, the commute has gained a bit more time than it had previously. This means waking up EVEN earlier than I already do.
GOD THAT SUX!
Anyone who knows me is aware that I'm more than comfortable sleeping until around 1 or 2 in the afternoon. So having to wake up at around 7:00AM is HELL for me. The one thing that makes it okay is the coffee. But today, while riding the train to work, I went to take a sip of said coffee and spilled it done the side of my face, neck and shirt. So the rest of my ride was wet and sticky. :( |
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| I Know It's A Little Late But..... |
[Oct. 13th, 2006|05:59 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  bouncy | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Panic! At the Disco | ] |
Yeah, even though it's tonight and I'm just getting around to posting about it....
My band is playing tonight (Friday the 13th hehe) at 169 BAR on East Broadway in the city. The show begins at around 9:30PM:
1)Smite
2)Going Normal
3)Sly Geralds' Band
Lots of fun and drunkeness are promised for all
Cover: $6
Take the F train to East Broadway stop. 169 East Broadway
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